Arguing is something we all do, but as Christians, we are called to handle disagreements in a way that honors God. The Bible has a lot to say about how we should speak and act when we don’t see eye to eye. Instead of getting angry or shouting, we can follow Jesus’ example of love, patience, and kindness. Through Bible verses, we can learn how to argue less and listen more. So, whether it’s with a friend, family member, or even a stranger, the Bible offers wisdom to help us disagree without losing our cool.
Bible Verses About Arguing
Proverbs 15:1
“A soft and gentle and thoughtful answer turns away wrath, but harsh and painful and careless words stir up anger.”
Commentary: This verse highlights the power of words in conflict. A gentle response has the potential to diffuse anger and prevent an argument from escalating. In contrast, harsh words can provoke further strife. The emphasis is on the wisdom of self-control and the importance of speaking thoughtfully in tense situations.
Proverbs 29:22
“An angry man stirs up strife, and a hot-tempered and undisciplined man commits many transgressions.”
Commentary: This passage speaks to the destructive nature of anger. Those who cannot control their temper often initiate arguments and create strife, leading to more sinful behaviors. The verse warns against letting anger dominate, encouraging believers to cultivate discipline and patience.
James 1:19
“Understand this, my beloved brothers and sisters. Let everyone be quick to hear [be a careful, thoughtful listener], slow to speak, and slow to anger.”
Commentary: James urges believers to prioritize listening over speaking and reacting. By listening carefully, we avoid unnecessary misunderstandings that often lead to arguments. This verse teaches the value of patience and self-control, especially in potentially contentious situations.
2 Timothy 2:23
“But have nothing to do with foolish and ignorant speculations (useless disputes), since you know that they produce strife and give birth to quarrels.”
Commentary: Paul advises Timothy to avoid engaging in pointless debates and arguments. Such disputes are not only unproductive but also lead to division and strife. This teaches us the importance of focusing on what truly matters, avoiding unnecessary conflict over trivial matters.
Proverbs 17:14
“The beginning of strife is like letting out water [as from a small break in a dam]; so abandon the quarrel before it breaks out and tempers explode.”
Commentary: This verse likens the start of an argument to a small crack in a dam that can lead to disastrous consequences if not addressed early. It encourages us to resolve conflicts quickly and not let them escalate. The emphasis is on peacekeeping and avoiding unnecessary disputes.
Philippians 2:14
“Do everything without murmuring or questioning [the providence of God], so that you may prove yourselves to be blameless and guileless, innocent and uncontaminated.”
Commentary: Paul exhorts believers to avoid complaining or arguing, especially when following God’s will. By doing so, they reflect a Christlike attitude of humility and trust in God’s plan. This passage challenges us to trust God fully and avoid disputing His guidance.
Proverbs 20:3
“It is an honor for a man to keep away from strife [by handling situations with thoughtful foresight], but any fool will [start a] quarrel [without regard for the consequences].”
Commentary: The verse praises those who avoid arguments and manage situations with wisdom. Those who are quick to quarrel are described as fools, suggesting that wisdom lies in being a peacemaker. It emphasizes the value of foresight and self-restraint in conflict.
Romans 14:19
“So then, let us pursue [with enthusiasm] the things which make for peace and the building up of one another [things which lead to spiritual growth].”
Commentary: This passage encourages believers to seek peace in all their relationships, focusing on actions that build others up. The verse challenges us to avoid arguments that lead to division and instead focus on edifying others, promoting unity within the body of Christ.
Titus 3:2
“To slander no one, not to be contentious, to be peaceable and considerate, showing true humility toward everyone.”
Commentary: Paul instructs Titus to teach the church to be peaceable, avoiding slander and contention. Humility and consideration are highlighted as essential virtues in avoiding arguments. This passage reinforces the need for a Christlike attitude in all interactions.
Matthew 5:9
“Blessed [spiritually calm with life-joy in God’s favor] are the makers and maintainers of peace, for they will [express His character and] be called the sons of God.”
Commentary: Jesus emphasizes the blessedness of peacemakers, those who actively work to avoid arguments and promote harmony. This verse underscores the importance of embodying God’s character by striving for peace in all relationships.
1 Corinthians 1:10
“But I urge you, believers, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you be in full agreement in what you say, and that there be no divisions or factions among you, but that you be perfectly united in your way of thinking and in your judgment [about matters of faith].”
Commentary: Paul calls for unity within the church, urging believers to avoid arguments that cause division. This verse emphasizes the importance of being united in faith and doctrine, avoiding quarrels that disrupt the body of Christ.
James 4:1
“What leads to [the unending] quarrels and conflicts among you? Do they not come from your desires that wage war in your members [fighting for control over you]?”
Commentary: James identifies selfish desires as the root cause of arguments and conflicts. This passage challenges believers to examine their hearts and motives, recognizing that inner conflict often manifests in external arguments.
Proverbs 26:20
“For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer [who gossips], contention quiets down.”
Commentary: This verse illustrates how gossip fuels conflict and how, without it, disputes die down. The lesson here is to avoid spreading rumors or engaging in gossip, as it often leads to unnecessary arguments.
Matthew 18:15
“If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens and pays attention to you, you have won back your brother.”
Commentary: Jesus offers a model for resolving disputes—approaching someone privately to address an issue. This avoids public confrontation and fosters reconciliation. The goal is restoration, not escalation of conflict.
Also Read: Bible Verses About Equality
Colossians 3:13
“Be gentle and forbearing with one another and, if one has a difference (a grievance or complaint) against another, readily pardoning each other; even as the Lord has [freely] forgiven you, so must you also [forgive].”
Commentary: Paul encourages forgiveness as a way to prevent and resolve arguments. Just as Christ forgives us, we are to extend forgiveness to others. This verse highlights the power of grace in avoiding and settling conflicts.
1 Peter 3:9
“And never return evil for evil or insult for insult [avoid scolding, berating, and any kind of abuse], but on the contrary, give a blessing [pray for one another’s well-being, contentment, and protection]; for you have been called for this very purpose, that you might inherit a blessing [from God that brings well-being, happiness, and protection].”
Commentary: This passage encourages believers to break the cycle of conflict by responding to insults and wrongdoing with kindness. By choosing to bless rather than retaliate, believers reflect God’s character and promote peace.
Galatians 5:15
“But if you bite and devour one another [in bickering and strife], watch out that you [along with your entire fellowship] are not consumed by one another.”
Commentary: Paul warns against constant arguing, which can lead to the destruction of relationships and communities. The verse emphasizes the need for unity and the dangers of allowing conflict to dominate interactions within the body of Christ.
Proverbs 18:19
“A brother offended is harder to win over than a fortified city, and contentions [separating families] are like the bars of a castle.”
Commentary: This verse speaks to the difficulty of mending relationships once an offense has occurred. Arguments and offenses can create barriers between people that are difficult to overcome. It highlights the importance of avoiding conflict in the first place.
Ephesians 4:29
“Do not let unwholesome [foul, profane, worthless, vulgar] words ever come out of your mouth, but only such speech as is good for building up others, according to the need and the occasion, so that it will be a blessing to those who hear [you speak].”
Commentary: Paul instructs believers to speak in ways that uplift and encourage others rather than using words that provoke or harm. This verse challenges us to be mindful of our words, especially during disagreements.
Romans 12:18
“If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
Commentary: This verse emphasizes the importance of personal responsibility in maintaining peace. While we cannot control others, we are called to do everything in our power to avoid arguments and promote harmony in our relationships.
Proverbs 15:18
“A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger and patient calms disputes.”
Commentary: The contrast between a hot-tempered individual and a patient one highlights the power of self-control in preventing and calming arguments. This verse encourages patience as a means of diffusing conflict.
Matthew 5:23-24
“So if you are offering your gift at the altar, and while there you remember that your brother has something [such as a grievance or legitimate complaint] against you, leave your gift at the altar and go. First make peace with your brother, and then come and present your gift.”
Commentary: Jesus teaches that reconciliation with others should take precedence even over religious rituals. This verse underscores the importance of addressing and resolving conflicts promptly and valuing relationships over ritual observance.
1 Thessalonians 5:15
“See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek that which is good for one another and for all people.”
Commentary: Paul reminds believers to avoid retaliating when wronged and instead to seek the good of others. This passage encourages a Christlike response to conflict, prioritizing goodness and peace over vengeance.
Colossians 3:8
“But now rid yourselves [completely] of all these things: anger, rage, malice, slander, and obscene (abusive, filthy, vulgar) language from your mouth.”
Commentary: This verse calls believers to put away all forms of destructive behavior and speech that can lead to arguments. The emphasis is on holiness and sanctification, reflecting Christ in both our words and actions.
2 Corinthians 12:20
“For I am fearful that perhaps when I come I may find you not as I wish, and that you may find me not as you wish—that perhaps there may be strife, jealousy, angry tempers, disputes, slander, gossip, arrogance, and disorder.”
Commentary: Paul expresses concern that he may find the church in a state of conflict and division. This verse serves as a warning against the behaviors that foster arguments, encouraging believers to avoid them and strive for unity.
Proverbs 15:18
“A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel.”
Commentary: The contrast between a hot-tempered individual and a patient one highlights the power of self-control in preventing and calming arguments. This verse encourages patience as a means of diffusing conflict.
Romans 14:1
“As for the one whose faith is weak, accept him [into your fellowship], but not for [the purpose of] quarreling over opinions.”
Commentary: Paul advises believers to welcome those of weaker faith without engaging in debates over minor opinions. This passage encourages tolerance and unity, emphasizing the importance of focusing on shared beliefs rather than divisive arguments.
Ephesians 4:26
“Be angry [at sin—at immorality, at injustice, at ungodly behavior], yet do not sin; do not let your anger [cause you shame, nor allow it to] last until the sun goes down.”
Commentary: Paul acknowledges that anger is sometimes justified, but warns against letting it lead to sin or linger too long. This verse teaches us to manage our anger constructively, ensuring that it does not lead to arguments or bitterness.
Proverbs 18:6
“A fool’s lips bring contention and strife, and his mouth invites a beating.”
Commentary: This verse emphasizes the danger of careless words. The fool’s reckless speech leads to conflict and even physical retaliation. It serves as a warning to think before speaking, avoiding words that provoke arguments.
Psalm 37:8
“Cease from anger and abandon wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil.”
Commentary: The psalmist advises against letting anger and worry take control, warning that these emotions can lead to sin. This verse encourages believers to trust God instead of allowing anger to fuel arguments and conflicts.
1 Corinthians 3:3
“For you are still [unspiritual, having the nature] of the flesh [under the control of ordinary impulses]. For as long as there is jealousy and strife and discord among you, are you not unspiritual, and are you not walking like ordinary men [unchanged by faith]?”
Commentary: Paul rebukes the Corinthians for their lack of spiritual maturity, as evidenced by their arguments and divisions. This passage challenges believers to rise above petty disputes, living according to the Spirit and reflecting Christ’s peace.
Proverbs 10:12
“Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers and overwhelms all transgressions [forgiving and overlooking another’s faults].”
Commentary: This verse contrasts the effects of hatred and love. While hatred incites conflict, love fosters forgiveness and reconciliation, covering faults and preventing arguments. It emphasizes the power of love in maintaining peace.
Also Read: Bible Verses About Surrender
What Does the Bible Say About Arguing
Arguing is something that many of us do, sometimes without even thinking, but it’s important to understand that it doesn’t lead to anything good. When we argue, we often find ourselves speaking words that hurt, making situations worse, and creating division among friends, family, and even within our community. God does not want us to be people who are constantly fighting with each other because that is not the kind of peace and unity He desires for us.
When we engage in arguments, it becomes easy to lose control of our emotions, and before we know it, we say things we regret or do things we wish we hadn’t done. God wants us to be people who seek peace and live in harmony with one another. Arguing rarely helps us find solutions; instead, it creates more problems and leaves us feeling empty and frustrated. It’s important to remember that winning an argument is not as valuable as maintaining relationships and showing love to others.
God encourages us to be patient, to listen more than we speak, and to let go of anger before it turns into something harmful. Arguments often arise because we are too focused on proving that we are right rather than listening to understand the other person’s perspective. When we listen, we can avoid unnecessary conflict and find peaceful ways to resolve differences. God wants us to be people who bring peace wherever we go, and avoiding arguments is one way we can do that. By being calm, forgiving, and kind in our conversations, we can reflect the kind of life God calls us to live, one that is free from unnecessary disputes and full of understanding and compassion.
So, as Christains, let’s make an effort to avoid arguing and instead seek to build each other up, to encourage one another, and to live in peace as God intends for us.